Kittens are frickin' stronger than me!  Seriously.

Was doing good all day, only went over my 500 cals by 22 cals which, whilst it wasn't exactly good, it wasn't exactly terrible either.

Then I gave in to temptation.

Mother had persuaded me to buy some savoury pies for us for lunch, there were 4 in the bag.  We each had one for lunch and that's why I went slightly over my cals.  Not the end of the world right?  Wrong.

Mother went home after dinner and I went into the kitchen to get a drink, and there they were.  The ironically not-so-greasy bag with 2 pies in staring at me on the kitchen counter.

Before I knew what I was doing I had eaten one of them.  The other one is still sitting in the bag on the counter.

After I'd eaten it all I could hear was Ana laughing.  It was torture.  'You'll regret it in the morning you weak stupid girl' she taunted.  And she's right, after all, she knows what she's talking about.

The temptation to purge and relieve myself of this guilty burden is overwhelming.  I musn't.  I shouldn't.  

You know what?  I'm not going to purge.  I deserve to gain weight.  Maybe it will teach me a lesson.  Hunger pangs fade, temptation eventually becomes easier to resist, but the desire to be thinner and thinner will never diminish.

There is light at the end of my tunnel still, and though it is far in the distance yet, it is most definitely there.

I hope anyone reading this had a more successful day than me.

GSK xoxo

NB:  End of day calorie count was 824.  I disgust myself.  Tomorrow I will do better Ana, I promise.