Happy 1st of October :) xoxo

Oh I do love Autumn. I know it's been Autumn for a while now but October is when it really starts for me. And with the countdown to Christmas already begun I think it's time that I set myself some goals to aim for with my weight in order to keep me focused. I do think focus is the key to success. If you become unfocused it's easy to spiral out of control, and then the depression sets in which makes everything harder.

Okay, I'm going to set myself an UGW (Ultimate Goal Weight) and IGW (Interim Goal Weights). If I try to aim too far I'm going to struggle so the IGW's will keep me on the right path, like little target post-it notes reminding me not only how far I have to go but as I achieve each one it will remind me how far I've come.

So, my UGW is 112 lbs (8 st). Although this may change to a lower figure in time, who knows. But for now I think that's realistic.

My IGW's are going to come down in 10's as follows:

IGW 1 - 150 lbs.

IGW 2 - 140 lbs.

IGW 3 - 130 lbs.

IGW 4 - 120 lbs.

Then it will just be a case of aiming for the UGW.

According to the scales I've lost another pound. Slow and steady I suppose though if I'm being honest I was hoping for more than that after yesterdays stellar effort and low calorie intake, plus all the exercise I got whilst painting the stairs ::groan::

Still, down from 160lbs to 155.5 lbs in 3 days is good. But it could definitely be better. 4.5 lbs lost is favourable to 4.5 lbs gained.

Today I was planning to fast, but under the watchful eyes of my BF I don't think that will be a) possible and b) a wise move. If he knew that I was going to start fasting I think he'd freak out. I wouldn't, but he definitely would.

That said then, I'm planning to have my first fast day on Monday. My son is at school and BF is at work so I am alone most of the day which will make things easier and keep what I'm doing under the radar. When my son comes home from school I can say I only had a late lunch so not particularly hungry yet,and when my BF comes over I can just tell him that I've already eaten and hopefully neither will be any the wiser.

Woah, when did I become so cunning and deceptive? That's really not like me. I kind of typed that paragraph without much conscious thought. I don't lie to people. But I think I may have to in order to avoid their worrying. I don't like the idea of people worrying about me.

However, on the other hand I can't stay at this weight any longer. And the amount of weight I've managed to lose in a short space of time by simply restricting and counting my calorie intake is alluring and addictive. If I keep this up it is possible I can hit my UGW by Christmas... And that definitely perks me up and motivates me to keep going no matter what.

Today I must not be coerced into consuming more than 500 cals. I know my BF will probably offer McDonald's for lunch and that will tempt me so much as my former binge eating self will scream for sustinance, but I MUST NOT BE TEMPTED.

I've skipped breakfast and am just going to have a green tea. Will drink plenty of water between now and lunch so that if BF does indeed offer takeaway I'll be quite full and thus it will be easier to resist the temptation.

Wish me luck.

GSK xoxo